New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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