Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
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