yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Come on in and take your pants off
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