Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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