So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
well most of my day revolves around power hour
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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