She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
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