what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
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