How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize
