i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
