i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
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