Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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