i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
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