He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
Randomize
