I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
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