We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
