Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
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