He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
