Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
return my video game
don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
But I just had this pork p�t�. It was dick grabbing.
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize
