Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
