Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
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