it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Randomize
