i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize
