6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
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