Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
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