just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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