is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
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