I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
