conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
