Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
My hair reeks of homosexuality.
im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
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