dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
I need a beard to bite.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Randomize
