I was to big spoon the shit out of you right now
I'm so hungover and dru,k
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
