Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
operation have a gay friend backfired
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
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