We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
I want her autograph on my taint
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
