It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
Randomize
