yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Randomize
