I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
Randomize
