I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
I don't think brook has ever known best
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
is wine microwaveable?
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
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