Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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