Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Randomize
