420 ftw
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
Randomize