so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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