Dude, I just woke up on the floor of some random chick's floor with puke in my hair and a posted note on my forehead that said "It's over." Dude I wasn't even aware I was in a relationship...
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
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