dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
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