that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
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