i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize
