That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
Randomize
