I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
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