You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
