is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
The air was thick with penises
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
Randomize
