Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
remember when u banged some random dude twice in the back restaurant room of the bar i work at with customers still there? and woke up with an enormous highschool-sized hickey this morning? no big deal.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Randomize
